Hitting the G-Spot (the gym, that is)

October 19, 2014

I’m thinking of joining a gym, there you go I’ve said it out loud.As much as I long for a toned body and a stomach that doesn’t require it’s own postcode, I will admit I’m apprehensive about the whole image that surrounds the ‘gym’.

The internet has shown me that people who attend these buildings have skimpy outfits and stomachs with lines on (I think they call these abs). There are also toned muscular arms on display and men squatting so that you can see the firmness of their ass (maybe gyms aren’t so bad after all).

But it’s these images of toned ripped women that have instilled fear into me, I don’t have a gap between my legs, unless I want to walk like I’ve just stepped off a horse and I certainly don’t have a stomach with visible abs.

What I do have though, is a longing to get in shape and I think the gym may help. I’m sure I will be more motivated running on the treadmill with a hot muscular man working out in front of me, I will attempt more sits up if it gets me level with their thick manly thighs and I will play naive by the weights to have them show me how they use them.
A question though; is it gym etiquette to lick their arms or will I be thrown out (again).

But in all seriousness, I’m single, possibly sexually frustrated and in need of getting fit, with the lack of sexual burnt off calories I’m guessing the gym is my best bet and who knows maybe one workout might lead to another….